.... well 20 years and 12 months to be exact, when Stephen, always in a rush and four weeks before fully cooked, decided to sally forth into the real world….. then became stuck in the birth canal and wouldn’t come out for 7 hours - no matter how I pushed! Mark, who I’m sure would have been happy to stay put and sleep for another 4 weeks was then very unwillingly dragged out by his feet!
This then set the trend for the next 21 years.
Take Easter Saturday for example. I decided to burn my garden rubbish in my 'tin bin with holes and a chimney for burning garden rubbish' - which henceforth will be known as TBHCBGR. Anyway I filled my TBHCBGR with sticks and wood and branches and placed it onto my Patio, which, after giving it some thought, was the best place to light it (solid stone flags that wouldn’t burn or cause a danger to anyone). Knowing that I could never be a successful Arsonist, Mark came out to see what I was doing “you don’t want to be doing it like that” he said followed by “do you actually have a match or a lighter” (which I didn’t – up until that point I was entering the kitchen with a piece of paper, lighting it from the gas hob, running outside and throwing it into the bin) So Mark came up with a cunning and well thought out plan. “Why don’t we screw up paper and shove it through the holes in the bottom of the TBHCBGR then light the paper, using a lighted candle” he said, So….. we were doing just that, kneeling down at the side of the TBHCBGR pushing pieces of paper into the holes and Mark was at the other side with the candle lighting the paper.
During this period of planning and thinking, Stephen had been observing from a distance i.e the kitchen window and coming up with a cunning and well thought out plan of his own.
Enter Stephen – who walked over to the scene in order to ‘help’ and threw petrol straight into the bin………………………
You know that joke, how do you make a dog go Whoooofff ???
I never knew that inside this less than athletic body was an Olympic runner… but there she was, doing the 4 second mile hotly followed by both sons……. There then followed about 4 seconds of complete silence from the three of us, followed by 6 seconds of shock and disbelief before Stephen, who suddenly found he had somewhere to be, disappeared
Happy 21st Boys – we nearly didn’t make it
This then set the trend for the next 21 years.
Take Easter Saturday for example. I decided to burn my garden rubbish in my 'tin bin with holes and a chimney for burning garden rubbish' - which henceforth will be known as TBHCBGR. Anyway I filled my TBHCBGR with sticks and wood and branches and placed it onto my Patio, which, after giving it some thought, was the best place to light it (solid stone flags that wouldn’t burn or cause a danger to anyone). Knowing that I could never be a successful Arsonist, Mark came out to see what I was doing “you don’t want to be doing it like that” he said followed by “do you actually have a match or a lighter” (which I didn’t – up until that point I was entering the kitchen with a piece of paper, lighting it from the gas hob, running outside and throwing it into the bin) So Mark came up with a cunning and well thought out plan. “Why don’t we screw up paper and shove it through the holes in the bottom of the TBHCBGR then light the paper, using a lighted candle” he said, So….. we were doing just that, kneeling down at the side of the TBHCBGR pushing pieces of paper into the holes and Mark was at the other side with the candle lighting the paper.
During this period of planning and thinking, Stephen had been observing from a distance i.e the kitchen window and coming up with a cunning and well thought out plan of his own.
Enter Stephen – who walked over to the scene in order to ‘help’ and threw petrol straight into the bin………………………
You know that joke, how do you make a dog go Whoooofff ???
I never knew that inside this less than athletic body was an Olympic runner… but there she was, doing the 4 second mile hotly followed by both sons……. There then followed about 4 seconds of complete silence from the three of us, followed by 6 seconds of shock and disbelief before Stephen, who suddenly found he had somewhere to be, disappeared
Happy 21st Boys – we nearly didn’t make it
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